More exciting news from the Western Front

I was planning another trip to the Ontario/Quebec in late June, and I discovered my friend Chris was going out the same way around the same time. So I moved my schedule around a little, and booked my flights this morning! So June 20-25 I’ll be in Montreal and 25-29th I’ll be spending at Toronto Pride Week!! I’ll be there for the giant parade and everything. Super exciting. I don’t have a plane ticket home, I’ll probably bum around Ontario, making mental love to my water. Go see my grandparents and uncle. These sorts of things.
And of course, get a bunch of things crossed off of my list!

Reflection Friday – Bridges Crossed, and other excitements like the Red Dog Diner

So, this reflection happened in the not-to-distant past, by which I mean yesterday.

I’m sure most people who know me know that I am scared of heights. Terribly afraid to the point of near insanity. Just last night I have an incredibly graphic nightmare about being in a plane that had an appointment with the ground and was hurrying to make it on time. I don’t like tall buildings, elevators, planes, cliffs, tall staircases, nor bridges. Planes are the worst, but bridges are a close second.

So today I had my training for the elections, which is across the river in Lethbridge. I got off at 4, and I was about 3 minutes away from the giant bridge (see inset) that attaches the two sides of Lethbridge to each other. I hate even driving across this monstrosity, but today I thought “oh hell, let’s walk across it!”. So I did. It took me the better part of a god damn hour to do so. Mind you the actual pedestrian bridge over the water (the scary part) only took 5-10 minutes, it was the not-so-bridgey-part that took so long. The fucking think is like a 45 degree incline for a kilometer once you get back to the West side of town, shit! I thought I was so badass with my 30 minute incline-level-6 jogs I do most days at the gym, but this was like 40 minutes incline-level-12!

Regardless, I crossed that bridge. It was scary, I know that sounds lame, but giant concrete structures extending high over water/land scare me like only planes and zombies can. And possibly my mother. I made myself stop in the mid point where there is a look out, but I quickly had enough of that, and I made the last half of the trip fighting the urge to run (in the back of my mind, bridges are ALWAYS collapsing behind me).

So there. I did something that scared the bejesus out of me today, and gave me a killer workout to boot. I also got #245 -work in an election off to a good start.

I also went to the Red Dog Diner last night with Adam which was one of the things on my “to do list for Lethbridge” that I made a while back. It’s located at 4th Ave and 6th St in downtown Lethbridge, with lots of great parking. The hours are fantastic, being open until at least midnight every day. The menu is sooo large, it’s hard to choose between smoked meat sanwiches, all the hot dog varieties, burgers, dill pickles, and the 13 or so kinds of poutine they have. I’m a regular poutine kind of gal, but you can get poutine with chicken and peas, or bacon and tons of other weird things. The poutine is a bit pricey (but worth it when you see the layered cheese *drool*) but it’s not going to run over $20 for two people to get more than enough to fill them up. It was SO delicious! 69 cents for TWO HOT DOGS. Dreamy.

Also, tomorrow morning I hope to be booking a trip to Montreal and Toronto for June with my buddy Chris. I hope it all works out!! I’m not going to sleep tonight, I’m so anxious for the o-k! on it!

The Big Announcement

Alright, so I have been holding onto this stellar announcement for a few days now, mostly because my mother is going to cast her disapproving eye down on me and I wanted to be out of the city for that, but also because I wanted to feel better and be somewhat coherent. Holy deja-vu. That was weird. I guess I care too much about what my mother thinks about too many things. Good on one hand since my mother had impeccable judgment, bad on the other since she’s wholly against the concept of having fun (unless you count fun as giving yourself a heart attack laughing at weird medical jokes…then she’s ALL over it).

Anyways. Onto the big news! I am going to Ontario! April 5-7th. Okay, crazy I know. On so many levels. At the moment, reading this over, I am thinking “what is wrong with you! You’re insane!!!!”, but what is this blog/list but not an adventure to become out-of-my-mind-Hunter-S.-Thompson-crazy. Maybe scale it back a little from that, though having a bender like Mr. Thompson did in Fear and Loathing seems like a mighty fine idea as I stare down the two term papers I have coming up.

I am rambling today. Here is the story: I have friends, Cal and J, who live out in Guelph.

They moved there from Airdrie this past year, and I enjoy their company quite a lot. We talk quite a bit online, and they asked if I would come visit them in April after they move into what I from here on in will refer to as “their mansion”. Well, normally I do not take weekend trips across the country (normally I don’t take trips), fly by myself, or accept extravagent gifts from people, but I haven’t seen them in quite some time (okay, a very long time) and it’s a wicked trip out East, back to my water and my homeland! I’m very very very excited.

So there. I have a crazy weekend trip across the country planned. I will take solice in the fact Sarah recently took essentially the same trip and had a good time. This will also fulfill #316 on my list which is to fly somewhere on my own. I think a hefty dose of Valium will be in order.

Off to class!

Picture of the Week

This was taken at the Stampede this past summer. I was highly amused as this horse had bangs. It always had the biggest dong I have ever seen, but when I tried to get a picture of that, he got shy and it shrank up inside, which was also highly amusing.

Elections – #245

Let’s just say for Reflection Friday that I was sedated yesterday for the first time in my life and a picture is to follow sooner or later.

This is just a quick hit to say on March 3rd I will be working the Alberta Provincial elections, which will satisfy #245 – work in a federal or provincial election. Pretty sweet. I go for my training this Thursday and then March 3rd I totally get to cross something off of my list.

Picture of the Week

Keith drew a picture of Adam on his hand.

Life in Lethbridge/Calgary

Alright, so I have been living in Lethbridge since September and not done much in the way of exploring here. I have found some rockin’ food establishments and a good place to drink, but I don’t think I have experienced the full potential of Lethbridge.
So I am making a quick list of things I want to do before I move away in April
1. Go to the Red Dog Diner
2. Go down to the river
3. Spend a day hiking along the coulees
4. Go to the Japanese Garden
5. Walk around Henderson Lake
6. Go to Head-Smashed in Buffalo Jump
7. Go to Fort Whoop Up
8. Take a trip to Waterton Park
9. Visit the Galt Museum
10. Visit Picture Butte because of the name
11. Go to Taber and see the Giant Woman and Giant Corn Stalks
12. Go to Pincher Creek and see the Giant Pinchers
13. See the giant wind gauge in Lethbridge

So there’s my Mini-List

Am I Willing To Get Arrested?

Alright, so number 152 on my list is to party like a rockstar in Dubai.
Well, that’s all fine and dandy except for this:

British tourist Keith Brown was sentenced to four years in prison after Dubai customs officers found a 0.003g trace of cannabis stuck to his shoe.

and

In one of the most extreme cases, it reported a man being held after poppy seeds from a bread roll were found on his clothes.

I’m not willing to go to jail for four years for stepping on a poppy seed or someone else’s drugs.
I’m debating removing it, both out of fear for myself and out of protest for what I consider to be way too extreme drug laws. Yeah, keep pot and heroin out of your country, but FOUR poppy seeds? Opium galore! I get zero tolerance and all, but zero tolerance must come with some reasoning abilities.

I’ll have to think on it. I don’t like removing things from my list, it feels like cheating, but at the same time, I don’t know if I’m willing to get arrested for this item in particular.

I added another thing to the list though. To go to the Icelandic Phallological Museum. It’s number 318. Trying to make it to 500 this year!

Monday’s Picture of the Week

I’ll be heading back to Calgary this weekend. I am excited to see my cat(s). My spring break is not full of many plans. I get to have an invasive procedure that involves intravenous drugs! Maybe Adam can take pictures of that so I can post them. Hah! Actually I’m getting two procedures done in one day. Fun times in my world!

I’ll be excited for tomorrow at around 4 when my three midterms are over tomorrow! Gross!

My brother’s in the Bahamas right now and I am super, duper jealous. Yes that’s right. I go to University and write three midterms in one day and my brother works as a labourer and goes to the Bahamas. Someone explain to me the whole thing about making good choices?

I may have a trip in the works, somehow though. Details later!

An Open Letter to my Momma

Hi Mom,

It’s your daughter. I’m taking a break from studying, it’s all I’ve done today. I was looking at that site you sent me about government programs concerning travel. While this was a nice gesture and a working holiday is certainly something I am interested in for the future, I can not help but feel that it was a devious deception of sorts. An attempt to lure me away from my true dream. My dream to take you to Scotland (not in the sense of pay to take you, but give you a surrogate pair of balls with which to gather the courage to actually go and do something you’ve always dreamed about.)

I am a much better writer than speaker when it comes to things pertaining to you, mother. I always dream up elaborate speeches to lure you into doing fun things, but you scare the crap out of me and to be honest you can be a downer. Sometimes you shoot my ideas down before they are even fully formed. Hours spent creating detailed sermons on the joys of whatever the event may be are wasted if the object of the preaching is you.

So here I sit, in between long articles and poorly written books on the French Revolution, catching myself thinking of how to convince you of just how much I want you to come to Scotland with me this summer. I can’t tell you in person, because it would come out whiney and insistent, no matter how long I practiced in front of the mirror. I know that you read this blog, so I will tell you here.

I have spent the last four years doing this I really don’t care about. To be honest, I didn’t want to go to University right out of high school, but certain events sort of pushed me that way. I’m 21 and have absolutely no idea what I want to do in my life. In a few years I’m going to graduate. So what then? Go to grad school and do more mindless readings and arguing? Get an office job and spend my day loathing my existence? Get married and pop out some kids and become an alcoholic? I don’t know at this point. What I do know is that I don’t want to waste my life. I only have 50-60 more years on this planet, and I feel I’ve already wasted 21 of them doing things that I was supposed to do but really had no interest in. Sadly, I don’t know what I am interested in. I like films, and I think film school would have been fun. I’m sure that will fade, just like everything else. This list comprises everything I know I want to accomplish in my life. Adam says it’s at least good I have a fall back plan, but I think fall back plans might be a bad thing. It’s easy to get comfortable doing things you don’t really enjoy.

Sometimes I see you and I wonder if you feel the same way as I do. I sit and wonder how at 21 (my age!) you were pregnant with me. It’s no secret you’d go back and change that if you could and do something different with your life. And I don’t blame you. If I was pregnant right now, I think my complete lack of ambitions in life would be the least of my worries. You were an awesome mom, and despite how much you would change I think you were meant to be a mother. Also, I am glad you had me as young as you did, because you weren’t some old hag when I was going through high school.

You say you would change things then. Fine. What about now? You have the power to change now. There is absolutely nothing preventing you from doing whatever it is you would have done differently instead of trying to poop me out in a toilet in some rural Ontario hospital. You’ve given me hints at what you want to do, and time and time again you come back to going to Scotland, staying in a castle, travelling. Every time I bring up doing it this summer, you brush it aside.

Well, you know what I’ve learned in the last four years? If you keep putting something off it will never happen. There’s the sum of $20,000 in first class education. You get comfortable doing the things you hate doing. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life that way and I don’t want you to spend the rest of your life that way either. So here’s my suggestion. We nip it in the bud. This summer, no fucking excuses anymore, we go to Scotland. Who cares about responsibility, money, jobs, obligations, who cares. They will all be here when we get back to worry about. If we stay here worrying about them instead of just GOING we’ll never go. There’s never a right time for anything, there’s only now.

So let’s do this now. Not next year, not with more planning time. Now.

So there. This is for all the times I’ve wanted to say something to you but been unable because you make me lose my words. I absolutely adore you and am only encouraging you to go to Scotland for your own good. I’m not asking you to stay in some little hut in Thailand with spider the size of your hand. It’s Scotland. It’s an easy first step. And there’s only now.

Love,

Chelsea

PS thank you for the grocery money